Is There Such A Thing As Effective Feedback?

Contributed by Elaine Landau

I was watching a talk show once about men and women and how men hesitate to say “I Love You.” The show host was interviewing this old guy in the audience. When asked how many times he had said, “I love you” during his 54-year marriage, he proudly said once. His wife smiled and squeezed his arm. The host, understandably confused, asked the wife why that was okay. She explained, “He told me he loved me when he married me and if he ever changed his mind, he’d tell me.”

That is an unusual agreement to say the least. It is human nature to communicate feelings, good or bad. We all want feedback from an early age. We look to Mommy and Daddy for approval, to teachers for grades, to peers for acceptance, and so on. We crave feedback from people in authority as a sign that they know we exist. It sounds a little pathetic, but it is true. For feedback to be effective, both parties must be willing to be honest and open to change. If the communication is clear and expectations are clear, feedback can lead to positive changes.

Managers and Feedback
Often, when managers take the time to give constructive criticism, their words inspire defensiveness, hurt feelings, or resentment. So, when is feedback really effective and when is it best to keep mouths shut and let things just go along?

When a manager sets out to improve an employee’s performance, the choice of words and presentation are key to how his/her feedback will be received. Here are some helpful hints that will inspire loyalty, not larceny.

1. When reviewing an employee’s performance begin the discussion with honest praise. What does the employee do really well? What good things have his/her fellow employees told the manager? By starting the discussion on a positive note, the employee will relax and be more receptive to feedback.
2. Be tactful and honest. If the employee needs to improve his/her computer skills, for example, the manager should not point out that everybody else can catch on, why can’t this employee? If that employee’s basic computer education is lacking, the manager should point that out and encourage the employee to improve. Suggest taking basic Internet training. If everyone in the department is more computer proficient, chances are the employee already knows it. By encouraging the employee to learn at home, the manager is expressing the belief that the employee can catch up with the rest of the department in the privacy of his/her own home.
   The manager does not want to embarrass the employee. In fact, feedback should include realistic solutions. A free Internet lesson. Free online, advanced tutorials in Word, Excel®, Photoshop®, PowerPoint® are needed to make this employee as proficient as he/she needs to be. By making suggestions, the manager is showing the employee that he/she cares enough to provide solutions to the problem. Then both can communicate about progress being made to improve the situation. The manager and employee are a team, trying to improve the employee, the employee’s contribution, and the employee’s self-perception and the perception of his/her peers.
3. If a manager is trying to motivate employees to improve, including them in the broader picture is always helpful. For example, employees need to move faster because quotas are not being met and there is a possibility that the company could lose its biggest client. With all the information, not just the message “move faster,” the employee feels as if he/she is part of the solution, not the problem.
4. Never assume an employee knows the company status. Many managers assume that when profits are down and clients are unhappy, the employees know it. By taking the time to inform employees, the manager is reinforcing the need for change and motivating the employees to make that change for the good of the company. By saying nothing or simply criticizing, the employees have no idea why management is dictating change and resentment grows from confusion. Positive feedback during positive times is also essential for good communication. If profits are up and clients are happy, informing the employees and letting them know that they are key to the company’s success, is motivating feedback.
5. Avoidance is not a good option. Feedback is always preferable to no feedback or communication at all. Some managers hate confrontation so much, that they just redo the work of a substandard employee. When the manager simply accepts the work and redoes it, the employee never knows his/her work is not up to par. Then when their reviews come around and it is all negative, both parties suffer from the inevitable bad feelings and negative outcomes.
6. Providing feedback effectively is a skill that needs to be sharpened by every good manager. Sensitivity, honesty, and good communication skills are the difference between motivating meetings and hurtful encounters.

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About the Author:
Elaine Landau is a freelance writer, publicist, web site editor, and television writer with more than 15 years of experience in marketing, advertising, and publicity.

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